Sunday, September 18, 2011

The Obama Meltdown... and other fun facts

The following from

Fun Facts About History & Our Politics Today
1. Obama is a childlike nut that we may just to get see melt down to a fetal position before this is over.
I’ve written about this before and I can’t wait. This idiot is so screwed up, so full of himself he actually believed he was as great as his puppet masters led the rest of the fools to believe. Next time they prop up some fool for stupid voters they better tell the candidate it’s all just a fake game. Obama is a basket case and his handlers are scrambling to keep him from hiding under his big free desk. Every time he gets negative feedback, which means every time he does something dumb, his handlers (psycho-baby sitters) run him out of the room and off to vacation in some very expensive “happy place” where he can spend our money while his psycho counselors tell him how great and powerful he is. The record indicates it usually takes about 7-10 days to make him stable enough to stand in front of a teleprompter to read something quite Presidential while he does all those imposing poses they keep trying to teach him. I’d love to read a teleprompter in real time. You know they add in things like, “lift your chin and shut up for a sec. Pause between every word. Frown for 3 seconds….” What I’d really love is a chance to hack that teleprompter for 15 minutes during any speech anywhere. I’d put in Mary Had a Little lamb followed by the tales of Peter Rabbit with appropriate facial gestures of course. He’d read it.
The guy is mental salad and only by ducking him out of range can they keep him stable enough to fake stability. Everytime they bring him back from his “Happy Place Vacations in Hiding” they send him on speech tours to friendly crowds. Like in front of unions, teachers in general or cities full of gay guys.
2. The First Lady- our Official First Beyotch. This beast runs blocks for her crazy hubby every time he gets scared and needs to be coddled by his therapists. Every time the poll numbers drop she watches for him peeing in his sleep and off they go to fabulous vacations with private US planes for 2! Like now, he is crashing and burning so she trots out another attack on fast food and the stuff we enjoy eating just so people have something to distract them from her failing boy-toy.
Moochelle “junk in da trunk” Obama needs to have a look at an aerial view of her own butt before she be dissin us. When her big ass no longer qualifies for it’s own zip code, she can talk about eating smart. How can anyone who eats as much comfort food as her be so angry? For the first time in my life I am ashamed of a black First Lady.
I wonder what she is ashamed of? Marian Robinson? Ya know her? Michelle’s Mama moved into the White House right along with her and Bammy. She goes on every trip with them and she has Secret Service protection at our expense. Last time I heard about her she had chewed Mochelle’s arse for faking that healthy veggie garden outside the WH. She saw the crew come in at night replacing starter plants with full grown stuff and cried foul in front of a reporter. Poor old girl hasn’t been seen or heard from since.
If Madame Black Spite really wants to curb unhealthy eatingshe should demand a swimsuit pic of her butt be posted above the counter or order window at every food retailer in the U.S. She could be looking over her shoulder with her best Rosie O’Donnel-perma-frown with a caption saying, “Don’t touch this!” We wouldn’t.
Even though she honors her “roots” by getting her fro straightened and hanging out with white elitist liberals who went to universities with all white track teams she just can’t seem to find time to help all those damaged urban blacks they climbed on to reach a better life. Forget the drugs and broken families, them people are eating FRIES!! Can I give her a tip? Psst-Michelle! Eating like a rich white Frenchman can make your butt huge while leaving the top untouched and flat as a 12 yr old.
3. Jews. We have to hate them now because Arabs ran the slave trade out of Africa!
Yep! The Arabs ran slaves on trade ships all over the globe and the Jews did not stop them. We tried. The first US Navy was sent out to kill muslim pirates off N. Africa. You know that song, “…to the shores of Tripoli.“ Yes , that was our first Marines drowning every Arab muzzie we didn’t have time to shoot with muzzle loaders or stick a cutlass in. Now we kill 2 and rebuild their bridges, hospitals, schools and roads at our expense while they plant IED’s in front of our military engineers. We have evolved. I guess. Jews don’t do that.
Not only that! The Jews just kept minding their own business and working to grow their own nation while the Arab leaders just sold oil, keep the profits and let their people wipe their butts with their left hands because they have no jobs that will bring them the wages required for toilet paper. The Jews did not stop this so we must hate them, I guess. Those Arabs that Obama loves so much were so poorly managed by the Jews they sold white slaves, black slaves and slaves with colors that were hard to define. Once in the 1600’s, the Jews even let them Arabs sail up to Baltimore and carry off more than 100 white slaves for sale in places unknown. Men, women and little kids. Why did the Jews allow this? Those pesky Jews were too busy minding their own business…again. Even today, in these modern times the combined economic output of all Arab nations is less than lowly Finland if you don’t count the oil dollars the West developed for them. What industries have the Jews given all those Arab nations that led the modern world until crazy Islamists bled them back into the 6th century?
Arabs are now our friends, screw those Jews. Arabian nations do so much for the good of the planet we now insult old allies while helping them. I’m not sure exactly what good it is any of them do for anyone else but Obama knows. Trust that. He is on it. That is why we just sit here while he helps us spend money to help the robed wife beaters take over the entire Middle East. Why is it nations should always move forward? Where is that written? What is wrong with letting an entire region of backwards, hateful religious cult zealots having nuclear missiles and billions of dollars of our tax money to attack our old allies and our interests with? We should hate the Jews for being surrounded by nations like that and not taking part.
It was no strange coincidence that Abdullah and Sahib didn’t bravely plant bombs for innocent strangers on the anniversary of 9/11. Why should they? We are spending ourselves deeply into debt to unseat every leader in the Mid-East that resists control by even crazier muslims. Why bomb another nation that hates Israel and helps whack-job Islamists wreck their homelands across the ME? They should be holding fat-free goat BBQ’s worldwide in honor of what our First Family does for them.
Good thing the Islamic people based in North Africa are still able to declare war on innocent defenseless blacks all over sub-Saharan Africa or the entirety of their historical tradition would be lost. I love our new friends, they are busy. The Jews just stay home and work. How boring.
4. China-why do they diss the Islamic nations?
Ever see China bending over backwards to help an Islamic nation?
I know why: Laundry envy. For a very long time the ancient Chinese laundry was famous for the quality of their work. As Cathay evolved, dynasties came and went and the western world invented wash machines, how do the Chinese stay special? They lost the corner on opium trade to Afghanistan and other people who we really like except when we kill them. They even tried making junk products for us but even their marriage to Wal Mart was not enough to restore their prized ancient honor.. They know they sell junk, what can they point to with pride? Laundry? Not anymore. The whitest whites are now the unsung badge of honor in the muslim world. Have you ever seen an Arab muzzie in a dirty white robe? I haven’t. How do they do it? No Chinese laundry is behind it. Those Arab sword-swingers can crawl out of the finest crumbling hut in sandland and they are spotless. Bin laden was filming grainy videos on junk Chinese Wal Mart cameras while hidden in dingy caves of “undisclosed location” and his robes looked like something Chan & Son could only dream of.
How do they do it? I think I know but my theory must be tested. Will someone help? Tell your wife you need 7 more wives so 4 can do laundry down at the creek full time.
( the other 2 spares simply raise your status so your wife should be cool with that.) China is a friend of ours. Just the interest we pay on our debt for the money we now owe them is almost enough to finance the army, navy and missiles they are building to confront us with. Why wouldn’t they like us? We aren’t the ones flaunting our superior laundry skills in every broadcast..
China hates Islamic people. They had their fill of them back in the days of the Silk Roads and trade caravans. Muslim nomads ran around on fast horses with big bows shooting arrows into every Sino-soldier that peeked over the next ridge. They couldn’t whip the buggers. Couldn’t even catch them. How do you catch 10,000 guys on horses who need no supplies as they escape? They would eat horse meat, tenderly prepared by keeping chunks under their saddles all day. When water got boring they whipped up some tasty mare’s blood shakes and off they went! Cathay (China) would send people out with silk and spices to trade to others and the muzzie horse boys would just steal everything.
Yeah, China hates the muzzies and the muzzies hate them right back. So, why are we the ones that got the 9/11 attacks? Because we are nice. The Chinese are not kind enough to be attacked. When muslim agitators decided to lift their robes and poke the Chinese the response was quick and rough. The little black-haired soldiers caught a few of them, killed them after force feeding them pork then buried the poor muslim idiots wrapped in pigskins so Allah and his herd of gift-virgins would be offended by their non-camel odor. Now the muzzies only attack nicer places. China is not worthy of their attacks because they don’t have the decency to respect their religious cult like we do.
More to come- we still have to talk about the truth of our fake discovery by Columbus, the pilgrims, our Founders and our Constitution. Then back to now.

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